


Being a Hero Stinks Sometimes

by AnimationNut



Category: Ben 10 Series
Genre: Cross-Posted on FanFiction.Net, Death, Despair, Don't copy to another site, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Guilt, Hurt/Comfort, Original Character Death(s), Originally written in 2011, Self-Doubt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-01
Updated: 2021-03-01
Packaged: 2021-03-13 02:21:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,629
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29769207
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnimationNut/pseuds/AnimationNut
Summary: Ben fails to save a life and falls into despair. Azmuth reluctantly pays him a visit to remind him that being a hero can be rough, and that sometimes life isn't always fair.
Relationships: Azmuth & Ben Tennyson
Kudos: 8





	Being a Hero Stinks Sometimes

**Author's Note:**

> I do not own the Ben 10 franchise.
> 
> Story contains a brief description of the death of an Original Child Character.

His room was dark.

The curtains were firmly closed, blocking any light from filtering into the space. He ignored the insistent buzzing of his cell phone, which lay carelessly on the floor next to his bed. He’d locked and barricaded his door, preventing his parents from being able to come in. He’d spent the past two days in bed, staring blankly at the ceiling.

He didn't care that he was missing school. He didn't care that he would be in trouble when he finally ventured out of his room.

Depression had its claws deep into his heart and soul and he had no energy to do anything. Not to talk, not to eat, not to shower and not to sleep.

It was his fault. He had been too late to save that little girl. The dark, gruesome image was stuck in his brain, forcing him to relive the moment over and over again, the memory haunting him.

...

_He aimed a cocky grin at the alien before him. "Come on. Is that the best you got?"_

_The bulky green-skinned mercenary snarled and charged at the teen once more. As with its other attempts to land a hit, he easily dodged and used Swapfire's vines to catch the creep by its thick ankles. "The bigger they are, the harder they fall,” he said cheekily._

_As it was being thrust into the air, the alien pushed aside its cloak and removed a laser gun from the holster strapped around its waist. He fired rapidly and he quickly ducked, letting go of the alien in the process to put some distance between them. The shot echoed behind him and he laughed, unbothered by the close call. "You missed!"_

_He thought the mall was empty. He thought everyone had evacuated once the alien started looting through the stores, wrecking havoc as it went._

_He hadn’t seen her. He hadn’t seen the little blonde girl who had slipped back into the building, eager to watch the fight between the villain and her favourite hero._

_The alien started firing wildly. He twisted and turned and caught the creature with Swampfire’s vines again. He threw him roughly across the atrium and when the alien crashed into the wall, it accidentally fired one last errant shot._

_The laser blast struck the ceiling a good distance behind him. It was not the sound of the explosion that caught his attention, but a shrill, terrified scream._

_When he whipped around, he had a millisecond to glimpse her horrified expression, her bright blue eyes seeming to plead with him to do something. But he did not have time to react and she was buried under a mountain of plaster and metal._

_He sprinted. He frantically dug through the rubble but when he found her, she was coated in blood from a fatal gash to her head and her eyes were blank and lifeless._

_She was dead._

_Anger, hot and fierce, boiled inside him. In that moment, he didn’t acknowledge that he had been too cocky. Too caught up in his taunting and teasing to properly take in his surroundings. All he cared about was that the mercenary had fired the shot that caused part of the mall to collapse onto that little girl._

_He pummelled the alien with everything he had, even after it fell unconscious from his blows and the Ultimatrix timed out. He only stopped when the police intervened, bodily removing him from the scene, and the last thing he saw was an officer covering the small limp body with a sheet._

...

A sound escaped Ben’s throat, a mix of a groan and a whimper.

Gwen and Kevin had come to pick up that day. He had been sitting still on a bench, shock and numb, and his friends had spent the entire ride home soothing him and trying to convince him that the incident wasn’t his fault.

He didn’t believe them. If he hadn’t been so focussed on mocking and playing around with the enemy before him, he would have bothered to make sure the area was still devoid of civilians. He had one job as the wielder of the Omnitrix, and that was to protect the beings of the universe. He had failed.

“What kind of hero am I?” he whispered to himself.

"Not one I would have chosen to be the wielder of the Omnitrix, never mind the Ultimatrix."

The familiar voice caused Ben to roll over and squint through the film of tears in his eyes at his nightstand table, where Azmuth stood. "What are you doing here?" he asked tiredly.

Azmuth crossed his arms and said, "When you wouldn't even see your grandfather, he got worried and contacted me."

A snort escaped the boy before he could stop it. "And what makes you think I want to talk to you?"

"I don't want to be here anymore than you want me here,” said Azmuth curtly. “If you're not going to stop this pathetic pouting, then I'm going to take back the Ultimatrix like I should have done a long time ago with the Omnitrix."

Though the threat was an often-used one, it still did the trick. It spurred Ben into an upright position, his blankets crumpling at his waist, and fire flared in his green eyes. "You have no idea what I'm going through!"

He could feel fear bubble in the pit of his stomach. Even through his grief and despair and doubt, he couldn’t find it in him to part with the alien watch. There was a piece of him that was desperate to redeem himself and he needed the Ultimatrix in order to accomplish that. He knew if Azmuth wanted to take it away, he had every right to do so. He did invent it, after all—Albedo had only made adjustments to it.

"So you failed to rescue one human. You can't save them all," Azmuth informed bluntly.

"She was only seven!" Ben exclaimed with frustration. "She had her whole life ahead of her! And I was right there and I couldn't save her!"

The tears spilled over and Ben buried his face in his hands, his shoulders shuddering with suppressed sobs. Sympathy pulsed within Azmuth at the sight of the grieving teen and he sighed heavily.

He had been reluctant to come to Bellwood when Max requested his help. It was no secret that the creator and the wielder were currently on rocky terms with each other. But Azmuth knew Ben, knew his emotions were strong and powerful to the point where they could sometimes be overwhelming.

“He needs you,” Max had said. “Though you’re angry with each other right now, I know he’ll listen to you.”

He was not wrong. The irritation and betrayal still swirled around Azmuth’s heart, souring his attitude. He was reluctant, these days, to allow the boy to keep the Ultimatrix after his attempts to hack into the Omnitrix. But he knew, deep down, that he was the only one worthy to use his inventions, even if it was sometimes difficult to admit it.

The universe needed Ben. Azmuth was going to have to push his reservations aside and help get the teen back on his feet.

"Tennyson, you did not know. You did what you could. Nothing more. Nothing less."

Ben lowered his hands and, for a moment, the vulnerable eyes seemed to peer at him from his ten-year-old features. “But—"

"How many have you seen perish?" Azmuth interrupted. "How many deaths have you witnessed or heard about?"

"More than I would like," he replied softly. "But what kind of hero am I if I let people die right in front of me?"

"A human one," Azmuth answered.

Ben pulled a face, not at all satisfied with that response. He struggled to put his thoughts into words. "A hero’s job is to protect the people. We’re supposed to always prosper.”

Azmuth raised a brow. "Tennyson, you above all others should know that there are many occasions where justice does not prevail. It’s not solely on your shoulders to deliver justice to the world. Sometimes evil and greed are greater. Sometimes mistakes are made.”

"But it’s so unfair. Even when there are heroes around people die and the bad guys get away."

"I'm certain you're tired of hearing this, but life is unfair. We cannot control it. We can only make it as bearable as possible. And you, Tennyson, have made the lives of the beings in this universe bearable by constantly fighting for them, no matter what."

Ben looked at his hands, his mind whirling. He swiped at the tears on his cheeks. “I know I can’t save everyone,” he said at last. “It’s just…sometimes I feel like I should. And I can’t shake that thought no matter how hard I try. But I know you’re right. I did what I could. Sometimes that’s not enough, and it sucks.”

His expression seemed a smidgen lighter. Azmuth nodded. “Indeed. Are you finished wasting my time?”

Ben was indignant. "You came here on your own free will!"

Azmuth rolled his eyes. “Unblock your door, Tennyson. Eat something. Speak to your grandfather. Do not make him ask me to come for a second visit.”

“Grandpa asked you to come here?” said Ben in surprise. “And you actually showed up?”

“I came on his behalf,” said Azmuth shortly. “Nothing more.”

He pulled his teleportation remote out of his pocket but before he pressed the button, Ben said quickly, “Wait.”

"What?” asked Azmuth in annoyance.

"Have I told you I'm sorry for hacking the Omnitrix all those months ago?" Ben asked hopefully. "Like, _really_ sorry."

"Goodbye, Tennyson," Azmuth snapped.

But just before he vanished Ben caught sight of the beginnings of a smile forming on the Galvan's face.


End file.
